We all know about the insanity pervading Brussels, but the latest news surely takes the biscuit – a biscuit baked to EU regulations, of course, and without sugar, fat, flour and all those other unhealthy ingredients.

One would have thought that there are a couple or so serious issues that might have occupied the mighty minds in Brussels, such as refugees, Schengen, terrorist attacks and ISIS. But nooo, the EU Commission must spend its time protecting we inept, accident-prone and plain idiotic peoples from our own folly at all costs.

Thus the EU Commission has seen fit to work out a “regulation” about candles, explaining what candles are, and working out EU norms, so that everybody will be safe from candles. Here is the official announcement, so you know this is not a belated April Fool joke. Also note well that it took Brussels nearly fifteen years from inception to ‘pronouncement’ of this Directive; those poor commissioners and their worker bees in Brussels must have had a lot of things to debate to finalise this staggering Directive.

“We” did not vote for this, thank you, Mr Cameron! But as we all surely know by now, our Whitehall Mandarins will implement this EU Directive in no time, and no excuses allowed.

While this whole Directive seems a ridiculous waste of time and money, it points to a more serious issue that has pervaded our society for some time now, and that most of us don’t even notice any longer. This is the creeping infantilisation of our lives, and the encroachment of the Nanny State into all we do.

Of course the bureaucrats here in the UK as well as in Brussels and in the rest of the EU love this. Nothing could be better for them than to take up one accident and use it to regulate our lives, with fines and penalties, and restrict our freedom.

Yes, free citizens were once ‘allowed’ to make mistakes and have accidents, and it used to be the case that we were told to take better care of ourselves rather than blame ‘government’ for failing to prevent us falling from trees, getting burned when holding a finger into a candle flame, or falling over, falling off our bikes, or, God forbid, eating what we like and getting fat.

Note well that these Directives regulate us in our daily lives unto our seasonal enjoyments by lighting candles in the winter months up to Christmas.

They never regulate the big corporations or the way they interact with their customers. We citizens are not protected because it’s our fault when we do things the way we have learned and have done for untold generations, having learned to take care ourselves; the big corporations follow EU Directives and are thus free of blame.

Meanwhile, we’ve been brainwashed into no longer recognising our personal responsibilities and into accepting that we are so inept at taking charge of our own lives that we need to have our hands held from cradle to grave by unelected bureaucrats who know better.

One wonders how humanity actually managed to survive in the millennia ‘BB’: Before Brussels.

Here’s another thing: have you noticed that, in spite of all the EU regulations, it is now impossible to buy items from other EU countries, either directly or through shops – including that huge ‘market place’, that company whose name starts with an “A” – in spite of the Internet having opened up so many possibilities?  Never mind; we must all be kept safe, spied upon, and made to follow Brussels rules.

Important issues such as terrorism, refugees and invasions, ISIS and government surveillance – they don’t concern us. We’re here not quite yet to do and die, but certainly to pay more taxes, do, and to never ask why.

So enjoy your candles this Christmas. Next year, they will all have been regulated into EU compliance. Although, by then, or course, the EU might well have outlawed matches…

Print Friendly, PDF & Email