The ‘Big Dog’ is trying to be re-crowned, God help us …

 

She’s gone, or will be once her successor has been ‘crowned’ by next week. Who will that be? In the mother-and-father of all comebacks it could be Johnson. The rumours started yesterday as soon as the first dust had settled, and now it’s the theme of the print editions’ front pages. However, the dear old Star didn’t disappoint us. They are jubilant because their Tesco iceberg lettuce survived Truss in No 10. Have a look at their front page – it’s at the bottom of the usual compilation (link)

Firstly, the ‘good’ news: Hunt and Wallace are not going to compete for the No 10 spot. Or so they said yesterday. Also, Gove is alleged not to plan to run. With the news of ‘Big Dog will be back Back’, who knows what the rest will decide. There’s one small but dark cloud on the BJ horizon: the HoC Privileges Committee still has to decide about Johnson’s peculations. Given that Labour desperately wants a GE now it is easy to see that they’ll do their utmost to stir the proverbial brown stuff, especially since the Tories really cannot afford to have to run yet another coronation should yon brown stuff forces a re-crowned BJ to resign yet again.

The commentariat in the MSM are naturally having a field day, and so do their ‘sources’ in the Tory Party. It’s all so very tedious. We’re again treated to the theme of ‘bitter rivalry’, with gossip that Ms Mordaunt ‘doesn’t want to play second fiddle to Sunak’ in the DT (link, paywalled) while The Times carefully slips off their fence, just a little bit, writing that the ‘bitter rivalry between Johnson and Sunak’ would make ‘P4P’ the ‘unity choice’ (link, paywalled).

Let’s have a quick look at how the latest PM selection, this coronation, will proceed. After all, La Truss said she’d be out by the end of next week when her replacement will have been found. Since she’d had a long talk with Sir Graham Brady yesterday, I’m sure she knew by the time of her resignation speech how Brady and the 1922 Committee would proceed. Here’s how:

Nominations opened yesterday and will close at 2pm on Monday. Any hopeful will need to have the support of at least 100 MPs. Given that there are 357 Tory MPs, this means there’ll be no more than three candidates left. Next:

“If three leadership hopefuls make the cut, a ballot of Tory MPs will take place at 3.30pm to eliminate one, with the result announced at 6pm. Either way an indicative vote between the final two will be held at 6.30pm and the result of that will be declared at 9pm. At that point the loser might choose to drop out and allow a coronation, in which case the remaining candidate would immediately become Prime Minister. But if they refused to do so, the contest would immediately proceed to an online ballot of party members for the rest of the week.That would close at 11am next Friday, with Conservative officials saying the final result of the contest would be announced “later that day”.” (paywalled link)

So the untrustworthy Tory membership peasants – they’re old and ignorant  anyway – will get a chance to vote again should their overlords, those mighty (and mightily stupid) MPs not be capable of crowning or re-crowning a PM all by themselves. It’s futile to speculate today who will emerge. Given the stupidity of said MPs who are now desperate to find a way to cling to their seats at the next GE, they might indeed go for their imagined ‘best chance of survival’ and plump for Johnson because ‘he’s a vote winner’. It remains to be seen if the electorate will be ‘charmed’ again by BJ. Hilarity in times of dire news is enjoyable  and distracting, but won’t solve the problems battering our country.

Looking into my own, cynically coloured crystal ball I predict that the candidate will win who’ll commit to leaving Wallace – allegedly the one candidate Labour fears most even though he won’t stand (paywalled link) – and Hunt in place. Remember the outcry by yon MP on Wednesday, about how job-grabbing has made the Tories into the shambolic party they are? In today’s DT, Andrew Mitchell MP also warns:

“Tory Party won’t survive with tribal gangs who back a leader just to get a Cabinet job – We are in the last chance saloon but there is still time to unite country and party if we elect someone who can control the economic crisis” (paywalled link)

We can expect acres of pixels in the MSM’s weekend editions, full of gossip by ‘sources’, trying to justify why one candidate is better and more unifying than another. There will be scant ‘news’ about decisions the Truss caretaker government will have to take. Will the candidates talk about budgets? The presentation of that Autumn Budget is only ten days away. Will the crowned or re-crowned candidate make promises to the current office holders about leaving them in their jobs? We’ll have to wait and see.

Now that Truss has thrown in the towel she cannot ask for a vote of confidence and trigger a GE. Labour and the LibDems are predictably demanding a GE be held now. The Tories however, be they ever so suicidal, be they ever so keen to dance the ‘Death Hoky-Coky’ by plumping for the ‘Big Dog’ again, know that their only chance to avoid a total wipe-out at the next GE is to plod on, in the hope that ‘events’ will turn things around for them.

You’ll have noticed that there’s one factor left out in all this political to-and-fro, including the Labour demands for a GE: us plebs. We’re after all untrustworthy and cannot be expected to vote as we ought to. Our concerns about inflation, about energy prices, about the coming winter and how to survive it, about illegal immigrants for whose comfort we’re paying through the nose, about Net Zero and green crappery: these are of no interest.

Westminster is set to play their beloved games of gossip, backstabbing, blood on floors and securing the best Whitehall ‘sources’. That’s all that matters to them. We, the electorate, the taxpayers, do not. I do wish the times we’re forced to live in were just a little bit less ‘interesting’.